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AGGIE JOKES. We should build a definitive repository.


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A woman hired a contractor to repaint the interior of her house. The woman walked the man through the second floor of her home and told him what colors she wanted for each room.

As they walked through the first room, the woman said, "I think I would like this room in a cream color."

The contractor wrote on his clipboard, walked to the window, opened it and yelled out, "Green side up!"

He then closed the window and continued following the woman to the next room. The woman looked confused, but proceeded with her tour.

"In this room, I was thinking of an offblue."

Again, the contractor wrote this down, went to the window, opened it and yelled out, "Green side up!"

This baffled the woman, but she was hesitant to say anything. In the next room, the woman said she would like it painted in a light rose color.

And once more, the contractor opened the window and yelled, "Green side up!"

Struck with curiosity, the woman mustered up the nerve to ask, "Why do you keep yelling 'Green side up' out my window every time I tell you the color I would like the room?"

The contractor replied, "Because I have a crew of Aggies laying sod across the street."

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An Aggie bought a pie at the county fair.  The vendor asked if he would like it cut, and he said yes.  The vendor asked if he would like it cut into 8 or 4 pieces.  He said you better make it 4, I don't think I can eat 8.

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  • 4 weeks later...

There was a Longhorn, a Baylor Bear, and an Aggie that were each tasked with crossing a hot desert. They were asked that if they could only bring one thing with them, what would it be and why? 

The Longhorn answered: water, so if I get thirsty, I'd have something to drink.

The Baylor Bear answered: food, so if I get hungry, I'd have something to eat.

The Aggie responded: a car door, so if I get hot, I can roll down the window.

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5 hours ago, Jet Jones said:

Two Aggies are walking home from the stadium after the game.

They notice a dog sitting in a yard licking himself.

One Aggie says to the other, "I wish I could do that"

The other Aggie replies, "That dog will bite you."

 

I heard this differently years ago.  The last line was "Why don't you ask him, he might let you".

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I have never seen it personally, but have heard that on occasion where Texas Highway 6 (Texas 6) runs through Bryan and College Station someone will write "A&M 0" at the bottom of one or more of the signs.

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A guy walks into a bar and says to the bartender, “Hey bartender, I know a great Aggie joke. You want to hear it?” The bartender says, “Well, before you tell it I should probably tell you that I went to A&M. And you see those two big guys sitting next to you – they were linebackers for the A&M football team. And those two guys on your other side – they’re Marines, and they used to be in the Corps of Cadets at A&M. Now, are you sure you really want to tell that Aggie joke?” The guy thinks for a second. “I guess not,” he said. “I wouldn’t want to have to explain it five times.”

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